Friday, February 8, 2008

I need a suckage meter.

I am so frustrated right now. You see, there is this teacher I have that I truly believe does not care for me. I have no proof of this other than a general negative vibe I've picked up from him. I didn't care at first but now I do care because I have come to value his opinion as a designer. That being said, he doesn't seem to care for any of my work either. Remember the Cabaret poster from yesterday's post? Well, I was really proud of it and my class and my other teacher all gave me positive feedback overall but today, when I asked him what he thought of it, he was like, "meh, it's okay." Now, I know that I live in a bubbling cesspool of low self esteem mixed with zero self-confidence, so this MAY be more in my head than not, but I know that it's at least partially true. I made him come to the hall today and pick out EXACTLY what is was that he did not like about the poster. He pointed out some general stuff like spacing and sizing, stuff that is mostly just tweaking, but he questioned a larger element that I had in it. I explained why it was there (my GD teacher suggested it) and what it was supposed to symbolize but he wasn't sold. I feel like I'm retarded. I feel like I'm too old to do this crap and that I'm not going to be able to get a good job because my work isn't good enough. I don't want to just be a graphic designer, I want to be a GOOD graphic designer but if I can't trust my own self in regards to the level of suckage a project has, what am I to do? Maybe I should just go back to the cube farm where being creative is not required nor encouraged.


Gwen said...

Stop it. You know you have what it takes and there's a reason you're still in school - to learn more and hone your mad skillz. Maybe this guy was put in your path to challenge you and take you where you need to go to be crazy successful. He's apparently talented because you value his opinion. Lean on him; use him; pick his brain dry. Don't get discouraged - use the angst you have right now to push even harder. You can do it and you know you can.

amy & jeff said...

thanks, gwen.

LM said...

Just because the teacher didn't like your poster doesn't mean it's not good. It just means he didn't like it. It's just his opinion on that one piece, not a blanket statment about your abilities. You're entering a field where there is inevitably going to be rejection. As much as it sucks, you're gonna have to find ways to cope with hearing stuff you'd rather not hear. It's part of the package. Every job/field has things about it that suck. There is no perfect line of work for any of us. Unfortunately. Don't forget that you'll have awesome days that you hear the praises of your work that will offset the crappy days.

johnny_VIRUS said...

This teacher that you speak of tends to do the same thing to me. I think it's a mental trick he uses to piss students off. I think he does this to us because he likes what we are doing but knows that saying negative things about our pieces makes us want to go above and beyond the guidelines of the assignments. You see, I thought that poster was epic and could easily be used outside of a theater.

Let me put it to you this way: Did you see other classmates' posters? It was like.. well.. a nightmare.

Hold your head high and you middle finger higher.