Wednesday, December 10, 2008

The First Day

So, we made the pickup. It was similar to picking up a UPS package, but with a lot more crying. A LOT MORE. Seriously. They said it would be hard and we knew it would be hard but we didn't know it would be THAT hard. They gave us instructions and paperwork and slings and god knows what else and 20 min. later we were on the sidewalk with him, his foster mom and our social worker hailing a cab. I stood and watched her try and hold it together but the tears came and I gave her a hug and thanked her for caring for my baby for 6 months and then the tears came from me and Jeff and finally she pointed to the cab, motioned for me to sit down, plunked him on my lap and shut the door. I looked up at her and she was crying an I felt so bad for her. They had already told the taxi where to go so off we went. I sobbed and Jeff sobbed and he was FURIOUS. Seriously. He was so mad and he wouldn't sit and he SCREAMED at the top of his lungs the WHOLE WAY. We almost got in two accidents because they drive like psychopaths here and the cabbie wanted us out ASAP, although he seemed very sympathetic to us and babbled in Korean the whole way. I held him in my lap, or tried to at least ( no car seat, we went Britney Spears-style, ya'll) and he cried and screamed and cried and flung himself around and hit my face and I was sobbing and it was NOTHING like the unicorns-farting-rainbows-style Lifetime movie you think it is. Not in the least bit at all. No soft focus, no "I love my new mommy!" no nothing. It was one of the absolute most difficult moments in our lives, all of us. Nothing could have prepared us.

We made it here and he was slightly okay until we got in the room and then it started again and I was sobbing and telling Jeff that maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all and maybe we should have just gotten another dog and then we put him in the carrier and I paced the room and suddenly he stopped.

Now, before you roll the credits and say "what a heartwarming story! That's Oscar material for sure" know that this did not last long. We got him to eat and take an hour nap,which was interrupted by Daddy dropping a wooden hanger on the floor and then we found out he LOVES water so we played in the sink but that again only lasted so long. I hope there is a sink on the plane because I am dreading this flight home and nothing I say will convey the overwhelming sense of fear I have. For reals. I am scared shitless. So we played and he finally tired himself out and fell asleep around 11:30pm and slept until 3:30am, which is why I'm up now. We fed him and he was back out. Le sigh. Seoul is truly a kick ass place and I've grown to really love it but I'm really glad to be going home. We went to the big ass crazy market again yesterday on the way to get him and between seeing a woman selling roasted silkworm larvae on the corner and the permanent smell of fermented cabbage and garlic that is EVERYWHERE, I knew I was done.
We leave in about 9 hours for the airport and then 20 hour flight home. Wish us luck. If you hear of a woman jumping from a 777 somewhere over Siberia, you'll know who it was.


Gwen said...

It may get harder before it gets easier but IT WILL get easier. He's beautiful. And yours.

Sara said...

I'm not sure I can say it better than Gwen. You and Max were in my thoughts all day and you will be tomorrow too. Sending you lots of good energy of strength and calm.

Matt said...

I am praying for all three of you. He looks so peaceful in your arms sleeping; which is the way that it is when they sleep. I am so happy for you; I almost got teary eyed looking at the pictures and video from your first meeting.

Rob said...

I'm so excited for you guys I can't stand it!! I can't wait to meet him and hear all about your trip. What an amazing early Christmas present!

Anonymous said...

Amy & Jeff,
What a beautiful baby boy! I'm so excited for you... I found your blog through Sara's... love reading about your journey! Enjoy the ride! It goes so amazingly fast and it gets better each day.
My thoughts go out to you!
-Karen Merrifield