Ick.

So, I didn't really get into this last week to spare you the gore but screw it. We were all sick over New Years. Not just sick, we were SICK. All three of us. I'm not naming names, but we were around some friends over Christmas that MAY have been carrying this crap around but we didn't have it hit us until a few days later. Max started it last Tuesday by throwing up in his crib. I thought it was nothing since he was singing as he threw up and has been known to gag himself with various objects for fun and was playing with a Doodle Pro and had the stylus in his mouth. I cleaned it up and disregarded. Then he started pooping like it was going out of style. Like 8 diapers in about 6 hours. I still figured it wasn't that big of a deal because he was running around and playing with his new toys like everything was fine and the doctor always says that if they don't act that sick, they probably aren't that sick. The pooping continued through the day accompanied by one more throwing up right after dinner. In fact, Jeff was holding him right after he ate and I looked at him and for some reason I knew that barfing was going to ensue. I was like "Jeff, I think he's going to throw up" and by the time Jeff ran the 10 feet to the bathroom, Max's dinner was making an encore performance. After some Gatorade and probiotic yogurt, he was finally on the mend and about 12 hours after the initial throwing up he was done. I was pleased that it was swift and relatively painless.

Oh how I was wrong. On Wednesday, Jeff got off early for the holiday weekend. He came home, Max was feeling fine by now and we were settling in for a nice long weekend. We had planned on getting a bunch of stuff done around the house, I was going to be able to catch up on work and Jeff was going to finally fix the speaker in my car that has been out for almost a year. By about 5pm on Wednesday, my stomach had other plans. I hadn't eaten all day, which I know is really bad for you but I tend to either forget to eat during the day or I'm just not hungry but by 4pm I'm starving and would probably eat the Donner party if they were in my fridge. Anyway, that Wednesday I had gone to the store to get stuff for us for the weekend and decided to pick up some chicken wings from the deli. I was so hungry by the time I got home that I wolfed them down while standing in the kitchen putting the groceries away. About an hour later, I was starting to question this food decision. My stomach was not feeling good and I felt really tired so I told Jeff he was on duty and I went to lie down. The nausea got worse and worse by the minute and soon I had to turn the TV off (WHAT?!) because there seemed to be a food commercial every 3 seconds and the mention of food was making everything in me do flips. It finally reached critical level and next thing I knew I was in the bathroom revisiting my chicken wings.
I will tell you that this was the most painful and violent illness I've had in a very long time. I was lying on the bathroom floor crying because the stomach pain and nausea were SO BAD that I couldn't move. Reading the label on the Pepto made me sick. Turning my head made me sick. Everything made me sick at this point. Liz and LM had already gotten it so I knew what I was in for but I didn't think it would be THIS bad. The worst part is that I hate throwing up. I HATE IT. I will do whatever is necessary to NOT throw up but at this point I was powerless. This went on well into the night. Jeff opted to sleep in the couch (smart choice) but apparently Max woke up around 2 so he had gone in to sleep with him. I woke up about an hour later, feeling better but worn out, found them on the floor and told them to join me in our bed so that maybe we could all get some sleep (not smart.) I must have drifted off at some point because I was suddenly awakened by Jeff darting out of the bed at around 6am and running into the bathroom to throw up. SUPER. This went on ALL DAY LONG. It was so fun to have two sick parents and a toddler who didn't give a rat's ass and insisted on doing everything he wasn't supposed to do all day. I think even the dog was throwing up. By early evening I was feeling much better and Jeff was on the mend but still not great. We spent our new year's eve in bed, me eating spaghetti (the only thing that sounded good) and him sipping ginger ale and we were asleep by 10:30. We were all 100% better by Friday afternoon but this thing was a DOOZY.

According to my doctor, this thing is going around so BEWARE. If you start to feel sick, grab a trashcan, have a seat on the potty and hang on. It's a very bumpy ride.