Cake Alert

I used my graphic designer skills this week. I love this cake so go to www.theatomiccakeco.blogspot.com and see if you agree.

I trust you will. Keep it to yourself if you don't.

He's going to a garden party. Of one.

So, we used to have a big garden in the backyard with tomatoes, herbs, and sometimes a veg or two but over the last couple years, we've been invaded by our idiot neighbor's bamboo and it's killed everything. Well, the bamboo and my lack of gardening skills, but I digress. He planted it and didn't bother to research the kind he planted (rumor is that he stole it. Seriously. He stole bamboo. CITY LIVIN', YOU GOTTA LOVE IT!) and as it turns out, he planted the kind of bamboo that will take over the planet in mere minutes. You can sit on my deck and watch this stuff grow. It went from invading a small corner of the garden to taking taking over the whole yard in 3 seasons. We've figured out how to reasonably contain it along the perimeter but there are still shoots coming up all over the yard and it basically killed the garden, not to mention almost killed me since I trip over the stupid shoots constantly. It not only invaded the planting beds, but it pretty much blocks all the sun so we haven't bothered planting much of anything anymore. However, I decided to plant peppers earlier this season just to see if anything would still grow and promptly forgot I did it. In my defense, I don't go in the backyard a ton because we are also unable to grow decent grass so it's a mix of dirt, twigs, rocks and clover and as you can see below, the bamboo also prevents the sun from getting to the grass and everything below it is DEAD. Because I am a sucky forgetful gardener, all the peppers that actually grew, and there were quite a few I believe, either shriveled up and fell off or the squirrels got them. Luckily for Max, they must have missed a couple because he found them yesterday and went a pickin'!
That's the one sad plant left. Even Max feels sorry for it.
But not that sorry! GET IN MAH BELLY.

He is clearly a budding P. Allan Smith, so I'm going to have him help me with it next year. BAMBOO BE DAMNED. If he's good at it, I might let him start mowing the lawn, too. I KEED, I KEED. I'll wait until he's at least 4.

Who you gonna call?

So, we had a very strange occurrence this morning. At about 6am, right in the middle of a dream, I was awakened by a loud thwack. It was most definitely a thwack and not a crash or a bang. Jeff and I both sat up and before I could say "did you hear that?" he was already up and charging out into the living room. On a side note, I was impressed by his bravery seeing he was in his underwear and half asleep but he was READY TO RUMBLE with anyone who wanted to eff with his family. He was not afraid to throw down in his boxer briefs and undershirt. He flipped all the lights on and ran up to the front of the house. We've been worried about break-ins and think our neighbors were burglarized a couple weeks ago, so this was a very real fear. In fact, we've noticed the po po staked out on different streets around us ever since that happened. While he was checking the front, I walked out and as I came down the hall, I noticed that Max's snack ball was laying in the middle of the floor. This is what it looks like:We keep Max's various sippy cups, bottle stuff (yes, he still takes one bottle. DON'T JUDGE) and assorted other things on the kitchen counter, which is about 3 feet or so away from where I found the snack ball. I picked it up and told Jeff that I found our intruder. It was going to kill us with trans fats and empty carbs. WHAT WON'T, AMIRITE? Anyway, we both sighed in relief and went back to try and get in our last 45 minutes of sleep before we had to wake up for real. When we laid back down, I started thinking about this situation. First and foremost, how in the hell did a snack ball that had been sitting motionless on the counter for days, and at least 12+ inches away from the counter edge mind you, suddenly fling itself off and roll 3 feet into the middle of the hallway? SERIOUSLY, HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? Anyone? It's not possible that the wind did it because nothing else blew off and this wasn't the lightest thing sitting there AND there wasn't any wind anyway. The counter isn't sloping because again, nothing else rolled.
This ball was even sitting in the corner of the counter. I AM SERIOUS. What the hell happened? I am now convinced that it had to be a ghost. There isn't any other explanation. When Jeff was heading to work, I threw the ball on the floor again to see if it was the same sound and sure enough, it was a definite thwack. I was like "that's the sound, right?" and he was like "Yep, that's it. How the hell..?" I shook my head and was like "heh heh, must be a ghost." and he laughed. I was serious, though and then he kinda looked like he thought it was really weird too and now I might have to throw out the snack ball (sorry, Liz) because maybe it's possessed and there isn't room in this house for a snack ball with a mind of its own.

Anyway, that's what happened.

He's a song and dance man.

So, Max is learning to talk. In fact, he is in his bed right this minute yelling, "BOOM BOOM" over and over. He is supposed to be sleeping. He's been saying mama and dada and babo (bottle) for a while now, but he's started using sentences now. He's really just repeating things we say a lot, but he's using them in context. That's pretty cool. He will point to something and kinda half talk-half whisper, "WHASSAT?" He will also ask us "whadodododoo?" which translates in English as "what did you do?" He will occasionally drop a "dude" or an "oh yeah" and he's a huge fan of "uh oh." He also spends a lot of time walking around having an imaginary conversation in another language, but he seems to know what he's talking about.

He has also developed a great love for dance. This is probably due to the fact that his mother has been known to do the "Thriller" dance in the living room when it comes on MTV. Which it does. Often. He's a big fan of the Wiggles and I made him a playlist of their songs, along with some choice "Yo Gabba Gabba" cuts. When we put it on in the car, he throws his hands up and shakes them like he just don't care. He still enjoys a good Black Eyed Peas or Madonna song thrown in, but those damn Wiggles have some kind of hypnotizing power. Kudos, fellas.

Jeff took some video earlier of him doing both dancing and talking. Now, he's not reciting poetry here, he's a baby who can kinda make words sound normal so don't be too judgy. I was also holding the camera and trying to hold him while he tried to take it from me, so pardon the Blair Witch style cinematography. BUT, you can totally hear him say "whassat?" Seriously. He really says it. He is also an awesome dancer.

Cake Alert

If you love cake and all things Canadian, and who doesn't, go to www.theatomiccakeco.blogspot.com. Even if you don't, go there anyway.

We went for a walk. She did not.

So, we just got back from taking a family walk. Our dog Zoey blew her wad early and was soon sprawled out in the grass "taking a break." Jeff didn't want to have to carry her so we decided to see if she would ride with Max. It worked out great. She was like this the entire time.

Jeff said something about her being "lazy." He said "Zoey is lazy." He was right.

Public Service Announcement: Adoption Edition

So, I've got a little bone to pick. Not with you guys so relax. I don't know if you know this, but Katherine Heigl, the actress on Gray's Anatomy, just adopted a baby girl from Korea. From what I've read, the girl is 10 months old (one month older than Max was when we got him) and has special needs (which Max also had.) Obviously, I've been following this story with great interest and I'm really happy for them, even though I'm not really a fan of the actress so much. I don't watch her show because it looks really annoying and I was forced to sit through some movie she did about bridesmaids dresses on a plane and quite frankly, no one should have been forced to watch that crap while trapped in a flying metal tube.

However.

Some of the comments from the articles I've read make me want to put my fist through the computer. I've heard her child referred to as "the trendy foreign baby she purchased," "her new exotic accessory," or that she plans to use the baby for "fame whoring opportunities," and my favorite "why can't she adopt a baby here in AMERICA?" I won't go on because some of them are vile and I won't reprint them. On several occasions, especially on those sites that I frequent and comment on myself, I've felt compelled to defend her and her husband, people I don't know, regarding their decision. With that, I'd like to say this:

1. Adoption is NOT EASY and isn't something taken lightly. It's not a way to avoid stretch marks (thanks Wal Mart checker for that gem). It's not easier than pushing a baby out of your lady parts (less painful certainly, but not easier.) It's a decision that (usually, not always) comes from years of struggle to have a biological child. Our adoption was 2+ years of probing, parenting classes (which every prospective parent on Earth should take in my opinion), background checks, writing checks, endless phone calls to government agencies where you may or may not get the answer you need, in addition to the mountain of paperwork involved every step. This was all after I had tried to get pregnant for 3 years. I didn't wake up one day and think "hmm...I'm kinda bored today. LET'S ADOPT!"

2. Foreign adopted babies are NOT accessories, nor did 99.9% of us who did it do it because Madonna, Angelina, etc. did it and we want to be cool like them. My aunt adopted my cousin from Colombia, South America back in the 80's and she certainly wasn't following some made up trend. Max does not match any of my shoes or handbags nor do I try to wear him around my neck like a stole.

3. There are MANY reasons why we, and many others like us, chose to adopt overseas. None of those reasons are yours or anyone else's business. For the record, a baby is a baby and if they don't have a home, they need one, regardless of where they live. For us, a Korean adoption was the perfect choice but I'm sure there are plenty of people that have used the US system with great success. That was their choice, this was ours. Neither is a bad one and a word of advice to all of you. If you meet someone who has an adopted child from a foreign land, don't be a jerk and right away ask them why they didn't adopt from America. It's not cool and I wouldn't ask someone why they got knocked up by THAT guy, ya dig? By the same token, I love to talk about our experience and I have no problem answering legitimate questions about our process, I just don't feel like anyone needs to defend THEIR choice. I get that it's a question that many people want to ask, just do it appropriately.

So that's that. I feel better now. Once again, I wish K. Heigl, her husband and their little girl all the happiness in the world.


Oh yeah, one more thing, and this has nothing to do with the actress, this is my own pet peeve (man, what crawled up my ass today?!) When you find out someone adopted, please PLEASE do not utter the following phrase:

"Well, now that you adopted, I bet you'll get pregnant! My (insert sister, cousin, friend of a friend's sister's aunt, etc. here) did it and next thing you knew, she was pregnant. YOU JUST WAIT!"

Ahem. I cannot get pregnant. I. CANNOT. GET. PREGNANT. It won't happen. Trust me, we've tried. A lot. The myth that an adoption spawns a biological child is just that, a myth. Sure, it happens, but that doesn't mean it WILL happen and while all I can do it smile and fake chuckle, inside it makes me want to scratch your eyes out. Just be happy for the person and leave it at that. Please. For the sake of your eyes.

Public service announcement over. Happy weekend!